The Unsung Victory: How Celebrating Small Wins Can Change Your Life with Chronic Pain

Living with chronic pain is like running a marathon that never ends, on a track littered with obstacles. Obstacles that hurt. A lot. The finish line is often blurry, and the sheer effort of just putting one foot in front of the other can be all-consuming. It takes such a great amount of effort. In this relentless journey, it’s easy for our focus to narrow, zeroing in on the pain, the limitations, and the things we can no longer do. It’s such a big presence, even those with a positive outlook can still feel defeated and overcome with the emotions that befall us Pain Warriors. I know it’s hard, but hear me out…What if we could shift that focus? What if, instead of measuring our days by the intensity of our pain, and our limitations, we started measuring them by moments of achievement, no matter how small? You might feel silly at first, celebrating having a shower, or making a healthy dinner, or even getting out of bed during a pain flare. But stick with it. No achievement is too small. Give yourself a high five, or celebrate with your loved ones, acknowledging your wins. 

This is the art and science of celebrating small victories. It’s not about ignoring the pain or pretending it doesn't exist. It's about consciously choosing to acknowledge and honor your strength, resilience, and progress in a world that constantly challenges you. It's a lifeline, a tool for survival, and a powerful way to reclaim joy and agency. By celebrating your small wins, you are creating a positive experience, which your brain likes. This in turn has your brain seeking out other ways to achieve these wins and positive experiences, because it makes your brain feel good, and your brain wants to feel good. As a result, you feel good. 

I know it’s easier said than done, but if you incorporate this practice into  your day to day goings ons, it really can make a profound difference in your mental and physical health. 

Why Small Victories Are Monumental in a World of Chronic Pain

For someone living without chronic pain, taking a shower, making a simple meal, or walking to the mailbox are mundane tasks. For a chronic pain warrior, these can be monumental achievements that require careful energy budgeting, mental fortitude, and pushing through physical discomfort. Recognizing these acts as victories is essential for several reasons:

• It Rewires Your Brain: Our brains are naturally wired with a negativity bias, an evolutionary hangover that kept our ancestors safe from threats. Chronic pain supercharges this bias. The constant, unpleasant signals from your body train your brain to be on high alert for what’s wrong. By consciously celebrating a small win, you are actively creating new neural pathways. You begin to train your brain to scan for and acknowledge the positive, a concept known as neuroplasticity. Over time, this can help counterbalance the overwhelming negativity of pain.
• It Restores a Sense of Agency: Chronic pain can make you feel powerless, as if your own body has betrayed you. It dictates what you can and cannot do, stealing your spontaneity and control. Every small victory, whether it's managing to do your physical therapy exercises or simply getting dressed on a high-pain day, is an act of defiance. It’s a declaration that you are more than your pain. Celebrating this reinforces your sense of control and self-efficacy.
• It Fights Depression and Anxiety: The link between chronic pain, depression, and anxiety is well-documented. A life of limitations and discomfort is a natural breeding ground for mental health struggles. Small celebrations inject moments of genuine joy and pride into your day. These positive emotional boosts release neurotransmitters like dopamine and serotonin, which can act as natural antidepressants and anti-anxiety agents, providing a much-needed buffer against the psychological toll of your condition.

The Power of Repetition: How Tiny Triumphs Build Big Dreams

We often dismiss small, repetitive positive outcomes. "Sure, I was able to stretch today, but I do that most days." Or, "I cooked dinner, but it was just a simple one." We must stop this dismissal. These consistent, small wins are the very foundation upon which larger goals are built.

Think of it like building a great wall. Each brick is small, seemingly insignificant on its own. But when you lay one brick, and then another, and another, a formidable structure begins to take shape. Your small victories are those bricks.

• Managing to walk for 5 minutes every day, and celebrating it each time, builds the strength and confidence to eventually walk for 10 minutes, then 20.
• Successfully making your bed each morning, and acknowledging that win, can create the momentum to tackle another small chore, like loading the dishwasher.
• Reading one chapter of a book on a day when brain fog is high, and allowing yourself to feel proud, makes it easier to pick up the book the next day.

These small, celebrated actions create a positive feedback loop. The act of celebrating releases feel-good chemicals, which makes you more likely to repeat the action. This repetition builds habits, and these positive habits are what slowly, but surely, improve your quality of life and help you inch towards goals that once felt impossible.

How to Celebrate: A Practical Guide for Every Pain Level

Celebrating doesn't have to be a grand, energy-draining affair. The celebration should match the victory. I usually celebrate my smaller wins by rolling a joint or doing a dab. I also like making a steamed milk with almond syrup. Not only does this feel like a celebration, but it helps me manage my pain, which is sometimes higher after accomplishing a small win. For bigger wins I’ll treat myself to an ice cream or go to the bakery. The key is the conscious act of acknowledgement.

Low-Energy / No-Cost Celebrations:

• Pause and Savor: Simply stop what you're doing. Close your eyes, take a deep breath, and say to yourself, "I did that. That was a win." Feel the pride and satisfaction in your body.
• Verbal Affirmation: Say it out loud. "I am proud of myself for making lunch today." Hearing the words can make the victory feel more real and impactful.
• Share Your Win: Send a text to a supportive friend or family member. "Guess what! I managed to repot my plant today!" Sharing multiplies the joy.
• Victory Journal: Keep a small notebook by your bed. At the end of each day, write down at least one thing you accomplished that you are proud of. On tough days, you can read back through your entries as a reminder of your strength.

Mid-Energy / Low-Cost Celebrations:

• A Special Drink: Take the time to brew your favorite cup of tea or coffee. Sit down, without distractions, and truly savor it as a reward for your accomplishment.
• Listen to a Favorite Song: Put on a song that makes you feel happy and powerful. Let it be the anthem for your victory.
• A Little "Me Time": Allow yourself 15 minutes to do something you truly enjoy, guilt-free. This could be reading, watching a funny video, or sitting in the sun.
• The Victory Jar: Get a simple jar and some marbles or pretty stones. Every time you have a win, drop a stone in the jar. Watching the jar fill up provides a powerful visual representation of your progress.

What If Celebrating Feels Impossible? Training Your Brain for Joy

For many, especially those who have been in pain for a long time, the idea of celebrating can feel foreign, silly, or even impossible. Your brain might be so attuned to pain and disappointment that it dismisses any attempt at positivity. This is normal. Be patient and compassionate with yourself. You are not broken; your brain is just stuck in a well-worn groove. You can gently guide it out.

1. Start Micro: Don't try to go from zero to a full-blown party. Start by finding the smallest possible win. Did you manage to drink a glass of water? Win. Did you take your medication on time? Win. Did you manage to get out of bed? Huge win. Acknowledge it with a simple mental nod: "Good job."
2. Become a "Win Hunter": Make it a game. At the end of the day, actively "hunt" for at least three things that went well or that you accomplished. They don't have to be big. "I petted my cat and it made me smile." "I saw a beautiful bird outside my window." "I didn't snap at anyone, even though my pain was high." Write them down. This trains your brain's "reticular activating system" to start noticing the good stuff automatically.
3. Use "Even Though" Statements: Acknowledge the reality of your pain while still honoring your victory. This helps combat feelings of toxic positivity. For example: "Even though my back was screaming, I managed to take a shower." or "Even though I was exhausted, I finished that important email."

Living with chronic pain is an act of courage. You are a warrior, fighting a battle that few can see or understand. In this fight, your victories, no matter how small they seem to others, are your medals of honor. They are the proof of your resilience, the fuel for your spirit, and the light that guides you through the darkest days. Start today. Find one small thing, one tiny triumph, and celebrate it. You've more than earned it.

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